Walking around in Denmark with my camera and my thoughts, I noticed a woman walking ahead of me with a child of about six years old. The woman I assumed was the mother was chatting away on her phone while the child be- bopped happily alongside her, not saying a word, but making little happy humming noises. I think of all the times I was on the phone when my kids were little. I think,
“Hey lady. You should talk on the phone when she’s not with you, or when she’s down for a nap or something. That happy hearted little kid will soon be a teenager who thinks you are an idiot and you don’t know what you’re talking about, and she will prefer her friends to you, any day of the week! Then she will be off and moved out altogether, and you will have plenty of time to be on the phone, but you will not want that. You will wish you were back in the days of having a little happy hearted daughter who adores you to spend your day with.”
How is it that we always manage to waste time with the people we have wishing for someone else? All the time the babies are little, we hold them and sigh, wishing for love, attention, and romance…(the adult version). And then they are grown and not needing us so very much. I am surrounded with attention and affection and love and romance and I find myself secretly wishing I had my kids around me.
So maybe, when you have a good love, a good friend, a loveable child, a sweet neighbor, a favorite aunt, or cousin, or sweetheart, you could give them all of your attention and appreciation. Knowing that it is unlikely that you will always have them. They may remain in your heart, but people are always moving around, or moving on, or breaking up, or dying. And then you wish for things that used to be. And once again find yourself wasting the now. Who is in your now? Who indeed?